Right now, I’m a pro at ticking things off my fucket list! What is a fucket list, you ask? Well, it’s like a bucket list, but instead of all the things you want to do, it’s the things you don’t need to do, or simply can’t be arsed to do!
I have an 8 month old, a 2 year old, a 6 year old, a husband who’s out of the house for 12 hours, 5 days a week, and I am self employed. Oh, and I have a puppy. Aint nobody got time for that!
I give no apologies for the following things on my Fucket List, and you shouldn’t either.
Do whatever it is you have to do (or not do) to get through your days, weeks and years of being a parent, because really, it’s so important to retain your sanity for the sake of those around you.
This post isn’t exclusive to new parents, it’s to any parents, at any stage, because as I’m finding through the years, every stage of having kids is just as hard as the last!
1. Putting the drier on when it’s 30°C outside
Because sometimes you just don’t have any more surfaces or room on the line to hang odd socks, onesies and work shirts. And even if you did, sometimes you just cannot be bothered to hang yet more socks and tiny pants.
2. Getting take away for dinner…again
Because sometimes you just can’t be arsed to move off your sofa, cook, serve and wash up after. Sometimes even a ready-meal is too much effort!
3. Wearing the same outfit for days
Because sometimes it’s too much effort to choose anything fresh, and you don’t want to create yet more washing for yourself! Besides, that’s what Febreze was invented for 😉
4. Hiring a cleaner to do your dirty work
Because sometimes you would just rather spend time with your family than have to clean the bathroom on a Saturday.
6. Wearing yesterday’s make up…today
Because sometimes self-care goes out of the window, and that’s ok for today.
7. Not washing your hair for days
Because you rock a topknot, and that’s why dry shampoo was invented. I now a competition with myself on how long I can go without washing my hair! My PB is a week. What’s yours?
8. Cancelling something that really wasn’t worth your energy
Because sometimes it’s better to cancel or postpone something non-urgent, than to please someone else and make youself tired/ill/unhappy.
9. Wearing what you slept in under your coat for the school run/appointment
Because sometimes you just don’t have time to do it all, and it’s either you looking less than your best or the kids going to school with a full tummy or walking through the door on time!
10. Not being intimate for ages
Because sometimes you just really would rather sleep.
11. Hardly ever shaving
Because sometimes you barely have enough time to wash, let alone shear the hedges…I mean legs.
12. Serving beige-coloured meals sometimes
Because there must be a vitamin or two in fish fingers, potato waffles, cereal or buttered bread…
13. Pouring yourself a wine
Because sometimes you need to take the edge off the day. Good thing there’s low sugar wine for a guilt free treat. I have invested in a wine fridge and reaping all the benefits to stand alone wine fridges.
14. Taking the day off parenting
Because sometimes getting your kids looked after whilst you do something for yourself is so needed. And it’s totally cool. That’s if you can get over the parent guilt to relax enough to enjoy your day.
15. Faking your child’s homework
Because sometimes you just don’t have time to read the book with your child, but you say you have anyway. (Sorry, teachers!)
16. Slipping a fully charged iPad under your child’s pillow so they don’t disturb you in the AM
Because sometimes an extra hour in bed is the making of a more pleasant day for everyone.
17. And maybe the most important one on the fucket list: not putting up with other people’s crap
Because ain’t nobody got time for that!
So, there we have it! If you’re a parent, your survival mode has been switched on (and will be on for a good few years), and it’s very normal to have to cut a few of the corners of life in order to feel like you’re winning.
A little reminder…
You are doing the most excellent job, fellow parent, and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.
What’s on your Fucket List? Let’s chat in the comments below…
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Last Updated on June 22, 2023 by Lucy Clarke
4 comments
A messy top knot is also suitable on a 5 year old when you have no time left to brush their hair!
3pm is a totally suitable time to have a glass of wine too!
Great post! Yep just about right… but fucket! ?
Oh god I loved this. Yes yes and yes again. Great post!
Lucy, I love this! I’m not a parent yet but I hope to be soon and I’ve been overthinking the whole “how to be a good mum ALL the time” thing. Thank you so much for sharing this openly and taking that pressure off! 🙂